


Times Jackie Made Pam Smile and the Time He Didn't

by The_Dancing_Walrus



Category: DCU
Genre: Crime Fighting, Earth-3 (Crime Syndicate Universe), Jackie gets around and it's not always a good thing, Loss, Love, Mental Health Issues, Multi, Polyamory, Sharing a House
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-20
Updated: 2013-06-01
Packaged: 2017-12-12 10:53:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/810769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Dancing_Walrus/pseuds/The_Dancing_Walrus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>House keeping, plotting to save Gotham and romance are just some of the things that get a little bit odd when you live with the Jokester.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

He'd perched on a table while she was working with her babies, the wide thin smile of a man trying not to laugh on his lips. She'd ignored him and carried on pruning off the leaves she needed, but always old leaves so as not to cause her babies distress-

 

"That-uh.....stuff you had-" Jackie began, licking his lips.

 

"What stuff?" She asked without bothering to look up.

 

"Oh you knoooooooow," He drawled, thumbing through one of her notebooks before losing interest and fingering a Hypercium "The _thing_ that knocks people out-"

 

"Don't touch that." She scolded, off-hand.

 

He continued undeterred. "You threw some at Owlsie's _gooons_ a while back and they all went to sleep"

 

"The barbiturate, what about it?"

 

"How's it work?"

 

The question made her look up because Jackie _never_ asked her anything that could possibly lead to a long (and therefore boring) conversation about plants, ecology or pharmokinetics. He smiled serenely down at her which made her one hundred percent _sure_ he was plotting something.

 

"It's a sedative," She began carefully. "Usually it's administered intraveneously. The modified version can be absorbed through the skin and I thought-"

 

"So," He interrupted. "How do you errrrrr _stop_ that happening?"

 

"Don't get it on your skin."

 

This answer clearly didn't please Jackie because he started to pout. " _Iveeeeeee-_ "

 

She sighed. "There's a silica based gel I use when I'm working with it. It doesn't dissolve in that."

 

"But it does in other things?"

 

"Yes." She confirmed.

 

"How about......." He tapped his lip as though trying to conjure something suitable although both of them knew he already had something in mind. "Lipstick?"

 

"Lipstick?!"

 

"Yeah."

 

"Why on Earth," Started Pamela, because she couldn't quite control herself, "Would you want it to dissolve in lipstick?"

 

Jackie had obviously been waiting for this question because his grin stretched a little wider. It was clearly the signal for a Jackie-Moment because he spread his arms wide as if inviting her to picture the scene.

 

"Just _think_ about it for a second. Next time I'm fighting Owlsie, after the SOCKO and KAPOW you knoooooow, the part when he's got you on the ropes and you're all uh _dis-orientated_ cos you've been punched drunk and can't remember which way's up and he grabs you like this by the collar and shakes you a bit and goes **I'm gonna gut you freak-** "

 

There is, she thinks, something slightly disturbing about how well the Jokester can mime out a fight with the Owlman by himself.

 

"Right _then_ , how about instead of........you know..............squirming outta it or being _rescued_ I uh put some of your barbie-whats-it in my lipstick and _kiss_ _him_."

 

To say that Pamela was stunned by this suggestion was perhaps the mildest description. Before she could gather the sense necessary to reply the Jokester had hopped down and was standing beside her grinning.

 

"Oh _come on_! Can't you just _picture_ the look on his _face?!"_

 

She could.

 


	2. Chapter 2

 

There were many things one would not wish to catch the Jokester doing if one had any sense to speak of. Sneaking out of the house at ten o'clock in the morning with a crow bar and a ten kilo bag of horse manure was one of them.

 

Pamela Isley was, too her disadvantage, marginally responsible. And as a result-

 

"What are you doing with my fertiliser?"

 

The Jokester dropped the sack, his hands shot straight up in the air as though she was Commissioner Flass.

 

"It's not what it looks like Officer!"

 

She raised an eyebrow. "So that's _not_ horse manure all over Eddie's floor?"

 

"No Ma'am!"

 

"Because it looks an awful lot like fertiliser to me-"

 

"Manure's not a controlled substance Officer!"

 

"And I'm sure you have a perfectly reasonable explanation for that crow bar?"

 

The Jokester considered this and shrugged. "That uh- probably _deee-pends_ on your definition of _reasonable-_ "

 

Pamela sighed, at least he was honest.

 

“What are you up to?” She asked.

 

“Couldn’t _possibly_ say Ma’am.”

 

“Jackie _why_ in the name of all that is holy are you stealing my fertiliser?”

 

“You can’t prove anything Officer! It’s all circumstantial!” The Jokester protested falling smoothly back into his little role-play.

 

Well if he wanted to play cops and robbers-

 

“You’re right.” She admitted with a stern smile. “Of course we couldn’t possibly prosecute…….but there’s nothing to stop me _suggesting_ to the owner of the floor you’ve just soiled that you _might_ be responsible for the mess……..”

 

“You _couldn’t!_ ” The Jokester protested his expression aghast.

 

“I could.” Pamela insisted.

 

“But _Eddie_ ’d _kill_ me!”

 

“What are Lazurus Pits for?”

 

“Not fair!”

 

“What are you planning?”

 

“Day light robbery.” He quipped.

 

She sighed. “Be _serious_.”

 

“Never!” The Jokester declared with a broad smile. “But since you uh- _asked_ so nicely and ummm _threatened_ so _convincingly_ I’m uh act-ually kinda, sorta about to……….goandwreckhiscar.”

 

She took a moment to attempt a translation from ‘Jokester’ into something she could understand.

 

“You’re going to _what_?”

 

“Wreck. _His_. Car.”

 

There was no need to ask who _he_ was.

 

“Which one?” She wondered.

 

The Jokester grinned. “All of ‘em!”

 

The image of the Jokester getting enthusiastic with a crow bar in a garage full of expensive sports cars flashed unbidden into her brain. Owlman would _kill_ him but………it was sort of funny and she couldn’t let the Jokester out alone; Three-Face would never forgive her.

 

Pamela stooped to save the manure.

 

“Have you got another crow bar?”

 

And the Jokester laughed.

 


	3. Chapter 3

She’d curled up on a sofa alone to cry and he had been the very _last_ person she’d wanted to see. But there he was smiling his small heartfelt smile. He sat beside her before she could tell him to go away, his expression full of sympathy-

 

And she found she couldn’t snap at him, couldn’t rage and scream the way she wanted to. It wouldn’t be fair-

 

“She was great wasn’t she?” He said, as close to wistful as he got.

 

“Yeah.” Pamela agreed, because _she_ had been.

 

“Smart as paint.” Jackie continued.

 

“Smarter.” She raised.

 

“And beautiful.”

 

“A stunner.”

 

“She didn’t have a bad right hook either…..” He trailed off.

 

She swallowed the lump forming in her throat and tried not to think of messy blonde hair, blue eyes wide and bright and perfect. A lazy, loving smile that could melt a stone, flecks of grease-paint still caught in the corners of her mouth-

 

“Oh honey,” He murmured and pulled her into a hug.

 

Her throat tightened-

 

“You can’t do this to yourself Isley.”

 

And she knew he was serious because he never called her Isley-

 

“We all lost her.” He whispered to her, not the voice of reason, never reason, but their heart the only one left who still couldn’t be bitter and broken.

 

Who still couldn’t hate-

 

And Pamela knew it was true, they _had_ all lost _her_. But that didn’t mean they’d all lost the same thing.

 

And you couldn’t snap at Jackie, couldn’t shout and rail and scream at him because it wasn’t fair. You couldn’t blame him for what he was. Jackie loved everybody; you’d have to be a monster to blame him for it-

 

But she’d felt like one that day.

 

He squeezed her and her throat tightened another notch.

 

“She _loved_ you-” Pamela blurted.

 

He pulled back, looked at her and all she could see on his face was confusion. He didn’t understand, he _couldn’t_ understand, because Jackie loved everybody-

 

“She loved you _too_ Ivy.”

 

“Yes, but she loved _you more_.”

 

He didn’t understand but he hugged her tight.

 

She didn’t realise she was crying until she put her head back on his shoulder and found it wet.


End file.
